Home > Who will be America’s NEXT TOP CHRISTIAN? (Jesus need not apply)

Who will be America’s NEXT TOP CHRISTIAN? (Jesus need not apply)

by Open-Publishing - Tuesday 9 November 2004
6 comments

Religions-Beliefs USA

by Jane Stillwater

In Los Angeles, they have a TV show called "Pimp My Ride". In the red states they have a TV show called "Pimp My God". Jesus need not apply.

Am I bitter or what? When I was a little kid, I LOVED being a Christian. Couldn’t WAIT to go to church. I just loved all that stuff about loving one’s neighbor and turning the other cheek. Yeah right. Then slowly I began to see what hypocrites that Christians were. I stopped going to church for a whole bunch of years. And then I went back.

"I KNOW these guys are all hypocrites," I told myself. "But I really do believe in Jesus." I forced myself to go back to church. I sat in the back pew and sang along. I was happy. Now here it is, 20 years later and my little back pew has become uncomfortable once again as the essence of Christianity is once again being ignored.

I LOVED being a Christian. Ah rats.

Any one who can kill 100,000 innocent human beings in the name of the Lord has GOT to be selling us snake oil. I can’t tolerate that. I’m sorry. And Jesus is sorry too. Because it means that when we have the GLORIOUS AWAKENING and Jesus comes again, cult Christians and neo-cons will use election-tampering and vote fraud to make sure that He NEVER gets elected to a second term as Messiah — and then He will be run out of town on a rail.

Who will be America’s Next Top Christian? The one who can slaughter the most civilians in Fallugah.

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From Jesus: "Whatever you did for the least of us, you did for me." Guess which unpopular liberal said that?

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View from the Right: NewsMax actually ran an article stating how clever William Rehnquist was to announce his cancer right before the election — and how stupid John Edwards was to wait until after the election to announce his wife’s struggle with breast cancer.

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From Marvin: The debt admitted by the Feds is 7 trillion but the actual debt — AKA Enron-style hidden debt — is probably closer to 20 Trillion. I have seen so many numbers that I cannot advocate any except it is more that 7 trillion.

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Exit poll graph: Here is an incredibly shocking graph from my friend Bob regarding exit poll info versus electronic voting results. My jaw just dropped!
– http://www.therandirhodesshow.com/todays_show.html

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From CLG News http://www.legitgov.org/ : CLG News has a whole laundry list of election fraud in Ohio, Florada, New Mexico, etc: "Alone in Ohio, officials cited homeland security —Warren’s vote tally walled off —Citing concerns about potential terrorism (?!!?), Warren County officials locked down the county administration building on election night and blocked anyone from observing the vote count as the nation awaited Ohio’s returns. County officials say they took the action Tuesday night for homeland security, although state elections officials said they didn’t know of any other Ohio county that closed off its elections board.

Oops! More fuzzy math in Ohio... Franklin County, Ohio —A total of 638 votes were cast in the precinct: Bush received 4258 of them, Kerry got 260.

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Concession doesn’t matter: It doesn’t matter whether or not John Kerry conceded. When they do the Ohio recount and Kerry wins it, he becomes the President no matter what.

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From Wayne: "Sounds like angry sour grapes to me, you are indeed going off the deep end. Why not just shut up and deal with it, we won, you lost." But, Wayne, what did you "win"? The right to slaughter civilians, lose your freedom, violate MY religion and bankrupt the country? Big deal. Looks like you ARE a winner! My congrats.

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From Nuc News regarding the depleted uranium "Mobile Armageddon": "All around the globe, our babies are dying from low-level radiation."
– http://www.dissidentvoice.org/Nov2004/Fiyouzat1103.htm

http://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/

Forum posts

  • It’s obvious you’re a fake christian. Most people invoke god to help them make the right decision. And you’re pretty judgmental since you claim that all christians are hypocrites; I guess you would know something about that.

    • I’m a Canadian. I don’t know much about Jesus anymore. Grew up Catholic, finally puked that foul poison outta my body at age 20.
      From where I see things in my igloo up here it looks like the U.S. is all about guns, mass-murder of innocent civillians (see Iraq), Praisin’ Jesus, more guns, more slaughter of children in far-away countries, and more Jesus, guns and "democracy". I won’t be coming to visit anymore until things change for the better.
      I don’t see Jesus anymore on Sundays, but I’m pretty damn sure he would not approve of all this trickery and mass murder condoned by your "Christian" unPresident.

      The next top Xtian will be Ahnold.

    • It seems as if your knowledge about jesus is the same as your knowledge about the US. It’s a good thing you don’t visit down south anymore for anyone to suffer your presence..

    • In the US they have a different God.Everyone has him in their pocket(well nearly everyone)Its called money,Thats why IN GOD WE TRUST IS PRINTED ON BANKNOTES.

    • sum 41 said we have lot’s of open space here in canada so all you dem’s come on up bring your ski’s in june you know it’s cold up here hahahahaha not a liberal weenie mike

    • Fuck the South. Fuck ’em. We should have let them go when they wanted to leave. But no, we had to kill half a million people so they’d stay part of our special Union. Fighting for the right to keep slaves - yeah, those are states we want to keep.

      And now what do we get? We’re the fucking Arrogant Northeast Liberal Elite? How about this for arrogant: the South is the Real America? The Authentic America. Really?

      Cause we fucking founded this country, assholes. Those Founding Fathers you keep going on and on about? All that bullshit about what you think they meant by the Second Amendment giving you the right to keep your assault weapons in the glove compartment because you didn’t bother to read the first half of the fucking sentence? Who do you think those wig-wearing lacy-shirt sporting revolutionaries were? They were fucking blue-staters, dickhead. Boston? Philadelphia? New York? Hello? Think there might be a reason all the fucking monuments are up here in our backyard?

      No, No. Get the fuck out. We’re not letting you visit the Liberty Bell and fucking Plymouth Rock anymore until you get over your real American selves and start respecting those other nine amendments. Who do you think those fucking stripes on the flag are for? Nine are for fucking blue states. And it would be 10 if those Vermonters had gotten their fucking Subarus together and broken off from New York a little earlier. Get it? We started this shit, so don’t get all uppity about how real you are you Johnny-come-lately "Oooooh I’ve been a state for almost a hundred years" dickheads. Fuck off.

      Arrogant? You wanna talk about us Northeasterners being fucking arrogant? What’s more American than arrogance? Hmmm? Maybe horsies? I don’t think so. Arrogance is the fucking cornerstone of what it means to be American. And I wouldn’t be so fucking arrogant if I wasn’t paying for your fucking bridges, bitch.

      All those Federal taxes you love to hate? It all comes from us and goes to you, so shut up and enjoy your fucking Tennessee Valley Authority electricity and your fancy highways that we paid for. And the next time Florida gets hit by a hurricane you can come crying to us if you want to, but you’re the ones who built on a fucking swamp. "Let the Spanish keep it, it’s a shithole," we said, but you had to have your fucking orange juice.

      The next dickwad who says, "It’s your money, not the government’s money" is gonna get their ass kicked. Nine of the ten states that get the most federal fucking dollars and pay the least... can you guess? Go on, guess. That’s right, motherfucker, they’re red states. And eight of the ten states that receive the least and pay the most? It’s too easy, asshole, they’re blue states. It’s not your money, assholes, it’s fucking our money. What was that Real American Value you were spouting a minute ago? Self reliance? Try this for self reliance: buy your own fucking stop signs, assholes.

      Let’s talk about those values for a fucking minute. You and your Southern values can bite my ass because the blue states got the values over you fucking Real Americans every day of the goddamn week. Which state do you think has the lowest divorce rate you marriage-hyping dickwads? Well? Can you guess? It’s fucking Massachusetts, the fucking center of the gay marriage universe. Yes, that’s right, the state you love to tie around the neck of anyone to the left of Strom Thurmond has the lowest divorce rate in the fucking nation. Think that’s just some aberration? How about this: 9 of the 10 lowest divorce rates are fucking blue states, asshole, and most are in the Northeast, where our values suck so bad. And where are the highest divorce rates? Care to fucking guess? 10 of the top 10 are fucking red-ass we’re-so-fucking-moral states. And while Nevada is the worst, the Bible Belt is doing its fucking part.

      But two guys making out is going to fucking ruin marriage for you? Yeah? Seems like you’re ruining it pretty well on your own, you little bastards. Oh, but that’s ok because you go to church, right? I mean you do, right? Cause we fucking get to hear about it every goddamn year at election time. Yes, we’re fascinated by how you get up every Sunday morning and sing, and then you’re fucking towers of moral superiority. Yeah, that’s a workable formula. Maybe us fucking Northerners don’t talk about religion as much as you because we’re not so busy sinning, hmmm? Ever think of that, you self-righteous assholes? No, you’re too busy erecting giant stone tablets of the Ten Commandments in buildings paid for by the fucking Northeast Liberal Elite. And who has the highest murder rates in the nation? It ain’t us up here in the North, assholes.

      Well this gravy train is fucking over. Take your liberal-bashing, federal-tax-leaching, confederate-flag-waving, holier-than-thou, hypocritical bullshit and shove it up your ass.

      And no, you can’t have your fucking convention in New York next time. Fuck off.

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