PRAISE BE TO EXECUTIVE ACTION

PRAISE BE

By Peter Fredson

February 7, 2006

We are at War. Terror is lurking in every corner to destroy American cities, factories, and people. It is those crazy fanatical Muslims that are to blame. They hate democracy, liberty and Americans.

We don’t know why they hate us so much. Our President is doing his courageous best to cope with this terrible danger for everybody.

Yet he has critics with niggling objections to his determined strategy of fighting Muslims where they live and to keep us safe where we live.

Our courageous President, as War President and Commander-in-Chief, has inherent powers to stop terror in its tracks and needs all our cooperation to ensure victory. Anyone who dissents is a traitor to our country.

Be assured that everything our President does is completely legal and necessary to fight terror. Alberto Gonzales, maximum Constitutional authority, stated that the President has “inherent” powers that don’t need consultation or heeding burdensome and outdated legalities.

So, let him do his job and get off his back with petty legalities and rights. He has only noble morals that oblige him to conduct interrogations, detentions, minor torture and abuse which is absolutely necessary to learn terrorist’s secrets and protect us from dangerous intentions and weapons.

He has been authorized both by our sacred Constitution and by the Supreme Ruler of the Universe to invade Iraq now, and later Iran and Syria, in order to fight terror and evil. It is in the best interests of the world that he acts preemptively and decisively to spread democracy and freedom to every part of this planet, by armed force if necessary.

He must also spread his beloved religious beliefs and practices amongst the infidels and heathens who put everyone in jeopardy of divine punishment and possible destruction of this present world.

He has assembled a remarkable Cabinet of noble personages, of outstanding prestige and wisdom, who will lend their talents to further civilizing the unruly elements of the world, such as North Korea, Pakistan, India, Russia and all the other dangerous people who seek nuclear power for violent conquest.

It is foreordained that only the U.S. has the moral authority to have nuclear and biological weapons, and that they are in the safe and capable hands of our noble President.

In order to spread freedom and democracy it was necessary to begin with Shock and Awe, unfortunately bringing death and destruction to thousands of infidels but to make an omelet one must smash a few eggs.

Our President was authorized by the Creator to invade Iraq and secure its oil for future generations.

He was successful in finding the evil ruler, and only had to kill 30,000 or 40,000 supporters in order to reinvigorate their sovereignty and liberty. It was not his fault that the filthy inhabitants of Iraq resented his peace making overtures and decided to impose terror on the world.

In order to establish American peace and democracy it is necessary for the President to use every tool at his firm command. Stealth, deceit, lies, misinformation, twisting intelligence, fooling congress, haranguing his faithful True Believers, exploiting every opportunity was necessary as the ends justify the means, especially when the President and his supporters have Absolute Truth on their side.

Secrecy is absolutely necessary to keep danger away from our country. That, and massive weapons, equipment, and cunning people like Condi Rice who are even now threatening foolish nations and seeking a good pretext to send our peacemaking missiles and pilotless planes into their undemocratic countries.

We must be relentless, aggressive, pitiless with those Third or Fourth World ignorant and barbaric people. We must either push them back to the Stone Age, or exterminate them unless they bow to our superior civilization.

The President has been assured by his assembled lawyers that all this is Constitutional. Of course the Constitution is out-moded and our President will soon rewrite another, but his inherent power of War President makes any consultation with other branches of the country unnecessary.

Besides, he has already made the Republican party his own cash-cow, he has successfully made the Senate and House subservient to his Executive Power, and finally has succeeded in stacking the Judicial Branch with the appropriate people to ensure his Unitary Executive position absolute power.

In addition he has made the Oval office into an adjunct of the combined Methodist-Baptist churches and single-handedly destroyed the absurd Separation of Church and State which has hindered the formation of a theocracy. Freedom of Religion means the freedom to become some sort of Christian or the Freedom to leave this country.

The fine fascist principles of Adolph Hitler, Benito Mussolini, and Francisco Franco will be instituted to make our country the wonder of the world. We will show true compassion by being Uniters and not Dividers.

We will stop secular education and substitute the True Faith of Intelligent Design. We will go back to our base of resolving all problems by the aid of prayer.

We will devote 80% of our National Budget to the cause of peace by manufacturing massive equipment and weapons, and building a military base in every country in the world for rapid response to those terrorists that threaten our democracy and freedom.

Everyone will have a computer chip installed at birth so that every word, every action, will be recorded. This is for their own identification and protection. If anyone should become treacherous, the chip will immediately explode to terminate the individual, but this is only for the protection of our Nation.

The President was assured by Alberto Gonzales that this is perfectly legal, even necessary, to repress terror. Everyone can breathe a sigh of relief that our President is in full control of our beloved nation and that the terrorists are on the run.

We will build a new Capitol at Crawford, Texas with a great monument to Jesus, surrounded by huge tablets of the Ten Commandments and a statue of the Virgin Laura. And Alberto Gonzales will be canonized as one of our new Saints.

Praise be!