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Edito Wars and conflicts International USA
A letter from Santa
By David Martin
G.W. Bush
The White House
Washington, D.C.
Dear Georgie,
I’m glad to hear you have been a good boy this year. I got a lot of letters from
other children who said you had been naughty. They were sure you were moving
back to Texas soon or someplace even hotter. But apparently they were mistaken
because your address hasn’t changed.
I see that the top thing on your Christmas list is 50,000 GI Joes. That’s a lot of soldiers, Georgie. I don’t think Santa can fulfill your wish this year. Have you thought about re-using the GI Joes you already have or maybe conscripting some from your friends?
Santa’s still looking for those Iraqi weapons of mass destruction you keep asking for. But I notice that instead this year you’re asking for something called an "exit strategy." Santa would like to help you out, but apparently a good exit strategy can only be properly made when the entrance strategy is built. I’m afraid it’s a bit too late now.
Your Christmas wish list always seems to include an Osama bin Laden doll. At least I assume it’s a doll you want. I’ve looked all over, but I can’t find one. Maybe you could ask you friends in Pakistan or Afghanistan to help you out with this one.
Santa would like to give you the tax cuts you want, but didn’t you already get a bunch of them over the last few years? If Santa keeps giving you tax cuts, there won’t be anything left for all the boys and girls in the lower income tax brackets.
I’m happy to see that you’re not just thinking of yourself though, Georgie. By giving people their own Social Security investment accounts, it looks like you’re letting them make lots of money by investing in high-risk American equities and the American dollar. My elves say it’s going to cost trillions of dollars, but they always tend to see the toy sack as half-empty.
Thank you for the pork rinds and the glass of Yoo-Hoo last year, but please consider some lighter snacks this time. Santa just lost his health care coverage and has to watch his weight.
Yours truly,
Santa Claus